The day everything changed: my daughters selective mutism diagnosis story

If you've recently learned your child has selective mutism or an anxiety disorder, you might be feeling overwhelmed, scared, or even devastated. I remember that day four years ago. Here's what happened next.

I'll never forget that day and how I felt

On the day four years ago when we accepted that our daughter was more than "shy," we were absolutely floored with the impact of the realisation.

I knew she had a problem with speaking to those she didn't know. But I was kind of ok with that, until I read the words "anxiety disorder."

The moment it became real

I hadn't even finished crying yet but I had to dash to pick her up from school (where she had been silent all day) and her Reception teacher took one look at me, whisked me in, gave me a tissue and calmed me down.

But I so vividly remember saying "I didn't realise it was anxiety" and thinking to myself, "the teacher is going to think that I am anxious and that's why my daughter is anxious."

Because the truth is I'm not what I would call "an anxious person" (of course I have some things in my life that provoke anxiety, but that's normal) but there is nothing like having a child with anxiety to make you, as a parent, feel anxious.

I'll never forget that day and how I felt. Read my whole story.

What came after the selective mutism diagnosis

But it also changed my life, and the life of my daughter. Because that was the kick up the backside I needed to take her challenges seriously and help her to make huge strides to overcome her condition.

But it also led me to the work I do now, and nothing gives me greater joy, pride and pleasure than helping to support parents when they are feeling like I felt, and helping them to make progress like my child has.

You're not alone

If you've recently received a diagnosis for your child, or you're supporting a child with selective mutism or anxiety, please know that you're not alone. That overwhelming feeling you have right now? It gets better. And so does your child.

Book a free call to talk about where you are right now and how I can support you, or join my mailing list to receive understanding, practical advice, and hope from someone who's been exactly where you are.

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About the Author

Katrina Batey is a trained SPACE anxiety treatment provider, mental health coach, and parent to a daughter who had selective mutism. She supports families across the UK and internationally to help anxious children build confidence and resilience. Learn more about Katrina.